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The Golden Era: A Berbician Perspective
At a recent event in the posh Pegasus announcing the PNC-AFC merger, the crowd went giddy over their certain victory in the coming election. Euphoria seems to have set in for the return of the Golden Era that our beloved Dictator, LFS Burnham, had once gifted to our nation. This has led me to contemplate and correct some of the misconceptions about our beloved Dictator.
Our beloved Dictator was truly a genius, bar none. He had anticipated the obesity epidemic of the western world 50 years earlier. His decision to put Guyanese on a severely calorie-deprived diet, which lasted for over 20 years, was unprecedented. Except for our beloved Dictator and his inner circles, obesity was completely wiped out in Guyana. On the education file, he was also far ahead of Western leaders in his thinking and implementation of free education. During his tenure, Guyana had really free education, free from books and free from teachers. With no homework and little supervision, our students were the happiest on the planet. Ours were the envy of the world.
His innovative skills were really underappreciated. Who else but him could have taken the lowly PNC membership card and turn it into a prized possession with powers to trump all educational degrees and open doors to a life of frolic and leisure. His ballot boxes, which allowed him to win election after election, could only be compared to Aladdin’s magical lamp. Any ballot that went in came out positive for him.
But his true genius lies in his political acumen. At a time when ethnic cleansing was not in vogue, our beloved Dictator has managed to depopulate more than half of Berbice without raising a single alarm bell in the West. He would have got the job done completely but for his untimely death.
As a Berbician, I must confess that Forbes had a tough love approach to us. Although we were last in line for anything available in Guyana, he did gifted so generously to us the three toll booths on our main public road. No other part of Guyana could boast of such generosity. Thus our beloved Dictator would always have a special place in our hearts. During our quest for greener pastures, we needed only to utter his name and we would be seized by a renewed sense of urgency and purpose to overcome all obstacles.
With the announcement of the PNC-AFC merger at the Pegasus, I can see that our beloved Dictator’s playbook is once again in play. The first act of the play has begun. As it was then Burnham and D’Aguiar, so it is now Granger and Nagamootoo. Should they perchance form the Government, I can only surmise what will follow. Nation building will be on top of their agenda. What better way to do so than to dust off Forbes and open his mausoleum for enforced visitation by school children. The nightmares of children are a small price to pay for nation building. On the economic front, I expect them to do better. Our beloved Dictator could only manage a tie with Haiti in the race to the bottom. Some of his economic geniuses are still around, so sole possession of last place is doable.
To all the scribes that have been working tirelessly but with little success to repudiate all the lies and innuendos ascribed to our beloved Dictator, rest assured that you are not alone. Your compatriots in other jurisdictions are also finding it difficult to do the same for Idi Amin and Mugabe. But I can assure you things will get better once Deliverance day is upon us. You will have the print media all to yourself. “How†you may ask? It’s in the playbook of our beloved Dictator, stupid. Restrict and control the importation of newsprint. Our beloved Dictator has used it to great effect. Surely you have not forgotten the single page newspapers of the contrarians.
To my fellow Berbicians, smile and be happy for life is short, but should Deliverance day arrive, sharpen your cutlass and be prepared to cut bush.
For us in the Diaspora, we will do our bit. We have been there before. We know the drill. We will start collecting empty barrels.
A Concerned Berbician.